


I Know I Wasn't The Only One

by BlackStoryPieces



Category: Captive Prince - C. S. Pacat
Genre: Actually both do, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Anxiety, Attempted sexual assault by Laurent's uncle (mentioned), Damen & Laurent are married, Damen cheated on Laurent, I swear it has a happy ending, Laurent suffers because of it, M/M, and were pretty happy, but Auguste saved him before anything too bad happened
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-01
Updated: 2018-06-01
Packaged: 2019-05-16 23:41:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 996
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14821119
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlackStoryPieces/pseuds/BlackStoryPieces
Summary: Damen cheated on Laurent.





	I Know I Wasn't The Only One

**Author's Note:**

> The work is inspired by the song "I know I'm not the Only One" by Sam Smith and a little bit by "Happier" by Ed Sheeran. I love Laurent and Damen and I swear nobody cries as much as I whenever I read there's some angst involved, and I really hope they have a happily ever after in the canon too without anything of it. But even though I'm a slave for these two, I can't deny that the idea of a cheating Damen isn't that unlikely since he had tons of partners before. Plus, we all know he's lead by his feelings more than his head sometimes. But I love them, so I swear I'll give them a happy ending.. eventually. You just have to stick with me a little bit, ok? :)

 

> _You and me, we made a vow_
> 
> _For better or for worse_
> 
> _I can't believe you let me down_
> 
> _But the proof is in the way it hurts_
> 
> _Sam Smith - I know I’m Not the Only One_

 

 

Laurent didn’t know. And that was one of the things that hurt the most. He didn’t know why. He didn’t know when. He didn’t know if it could have been avoided. He didn’t know if it was entirely his fault. He didn’t know with whom Damen had...

But maybe he lied to himself. Maybe he did know all those things but his head hurt. And his heart. He couldn’t think and figure things out.

And he didn’t know.

If he really wanted to know.

But there was one thing he was sure of: that, right now, he couldn’t listen to Damianos, who was standing in front of him. The normally soft brown of his eyes he fell in love with stood in contrast with that ugly red. Maybe the other man tried to explain himself. Or to tell him the story, to answer all his unasked questions. But Laurent stopped to hear anything the moment he heard the word “cheating”. His head spun. And memories tried to find their way back to him.

When they were still happy.

And that all.

Had never happened.

Their first meeting.

Damen’s attempts to court him.

His stupid smile. With his stupid dimples.

Their weeding. Their honeymoon.

All the times they had laughed together.

All the times Damen had held him because he needed him.

But he didn’t hold him now.

When he needed him the most and the pain caused him to go numb and cold again, similar to how he was, before Damen.

It was his fault to entirely trust someone, wasn’t it? But Auguste told him what a great feeling it was to let someone inside your walls, and his brother was always right.

But this time.

He hurt Laurent by feeding him with false hopes.

“I think a divorce makes sense, huh?” He asked and forced himself not to flinch. His voice had never sounded so weak. It was disgusting. But that was what Damen could do to him. Make him weak. Though until now it hadn’t been a bad thing. Not really. Because he kind of craved Damen’s ways to make him weak. His touches. His lips. His tongue. Other parts of himself.

Damen looked at him with fearful eyes and tried to step closer. Laurent took a step back. Damianos swallowed.

“Laurent,” he forced out and he didn’t sound any better than him. “Please believe me when I tell you you’re the love of my life. Everything I am, everything I have, everything I do belongs to you-“

“You mean like sticking your cock in-!” He wanted to lash his tongue out, to hurt him with his greatest weapon. But something unexpectedly happened. His words got caught in his throat and unbearable pain took hold of him.

It was like just then he realised what had really happened. He couldn’t take it anymore and with great horror he realised that tears strained his cheeks. Embarrassed, he turned around and took hold of the table. At the moment it was the only thing that he allowed himself to touch in order to support his growing weight. Could hearts become heavy when they’re filled with pain?

How could the man with whom he had stood in front of the altar hurt him so badly? Hadn’t he swore to never cause him pain and stand by his side for better or for worse? But maybe he just wasn’t enough.

Admittedly, he wasn’t the best husband either, those last few months. He distanced himself from Damen. He put much more effort in his work than in his marriage. He started refusing sex and then kisses and touches entirely. Of course sweet, understanding Damen asked if he had done something wrong, but Laurent hadn’t answered.

He trusted Damen with his deepest secrets and fears, except with that certain one, and so he couldn’t have explained his behaviour. He couldn’t have just said that sometimes he couldn’t stand being near another human being. Damen would have thought him crazy, or so Laurent told himself.

Though he knew.

Damen would have understood.

And maybe that’s even worse.

He didn’t know.

Honestly, he hadn’t had that before. Not really. He had never isolated himself so much before and maybe that’s the reason he didn’t do the right thing and tell his husband what happened inside himself. Because he didn't know either. But now it was too late.

The pain suffocated him. It was like a hand had wrapped around his neck and stole his air.

“Laurent...” He heard the broken voice of Damen. “Please let me... just... I don’t know. It sounds like a bad joke if I asked you to give me another chance, but that’s what I actually do. I love you so much. I just can’t live without you and I can’t believe what I just have done. I...-“

Distantly, he heard a thud and turned around. His heart skipped a beat at the sight in front of him.

Damen was on his knees, his eyes sadder than he had ever seen them before, unshed tears gathered there. Normally, it was his job to wipe them away. But now Damen had nobody to do it. Just like Laurent.

It was an unsettling sight. It made him think of the first and last time Damen had went on his knees before and it was all so wrong that this beautiful memory was now tainted with this ugly one.

“Please, Laurent, love.”

Laurent stared down at him. Instead of his heart, a black hole must have remained, just like he had read in his books. But that was not the case. Because he still could feel that damn thing beat painfully inside of him.

Or maybe.

Just maybe.

Damen didn’t have.

Shredded it entirely.


End file.
